Tid Bits
Below you will find rules of thumb, hints of politeness you can extend to your fellow human beings and interpretations of moments in life that may be gentler than those you are currently using.
1. If you are staying in a family member's home and they must go to work, do not try to chat them up in the morning. In fact, stay in your room and pretend to sleep in.
2. If you must go….I mean, you've gots to go!!!, do not use your poor planning as an excuse to use the empty handicapped stall. Many lovely folks I know would not DREAM of parking in a capper spot simply because they were running late but do not hesitate to use the capper stall. Don't do it people!! It is wrong!
3. If you borrow something and have lost it, own up and buy a replacement.
4. If you make a mess, clean it up.
5. Allow people to be other than happy. It's okay. It really is.
6. If you need time alone, take it. You're not doing anyone any favors by hanging around when you need to refuel.
7. "Needing time alone" does not equate to "needing time away from you." Don't make that assumption.
8. When someone is reading, they are doing something. Please note that before interrupting.
9. Be gentle with yourself. I mean it. Be gentle! You make a concerted effort to be gentle with other people, why not extend that courtesy to yourself?
10. Being gentle on other people does not include handling them so softly that they run you over. Regardless of their mental state, it is not you job to soothe others at the cost of yourself. Stand up and be firm. You're allowed.
11. Apologize when you're an ass. Note when others are asses and don't pretend they weren't. When you watch Deal or No Deal, note that all of those women, dressed exactly the same, used a objects of desire to open other objects of desire is ass. Tell your sons, "That's ass." It's okay if they're two years old. They still need to know that is indeed, ass.
12. Take your vitamins.
If you have tid bits that may be helpful to others, please add them to the comments section of this post.
Thanks all.
posted by Aerenchyma @ Tuesday, September 19, 2006
7 Comments:
I think I need to work on number 10.
My dad always taught us to leave a place better than how we found it. I'd like to add that for consideration here.
Also, while I still have your copy of the "Interpreter of Maladies" book you loaned me many eons ago, and it is not lost, I do plan to make up the extended duration of my borrowing with a treat of some kind (well, I know what it is but you don't yet) the next time I see you. I don't like to be an extended borrower, but there you have it - with this book, I was. Sorry 'bout that.
"If you can say yes, say yes. If you must say no, suggest alternatives."
"Consider the impact of your actions on others."
A corrollary to oneof yours:
"When staying at someone's home be as small as possible."
And I guess I should confess here that I use the capper stalls all the time. I think it's because I'm super mildly claustrophobic, but that's not an excuse, it's an explanation.
Best. Post. Ever.
You know, I just don't agree that using the handicapped stall is so criminal. I don't think it's analagous at all to parking spaces, because it's not like you're leaving a car parked for a long time and stopping a needy person from parking there; instead, I always assume that if a wheelchair-bound or other needy person enters a rest room where there happens to be a wait for a stall, she gets the big handicapped stall immedately upon the person in it exiting, even if others are waiting. That seems fair to me. Should it stay empty all day, just so the hypotheitcal wheelchair person doesn't have to wait 1 minute? When I was pregnant, i didn't hesitate to use the bigger stall (and the bar to help get up came in handy!), and I also want to note that in all my years of using public bathrooms, for whatever reason, i think I could count on one hand the times I ever saw a person in a chair or even using a walker or cane use the bathroom. Just my opinionated 2ct. All the rest of your tidbits.... thumbs up! - Mim
Are you nuts??? Don't tell your son that all of those women, dressed exactly the same, used as objects of desire to open other objects of desire is ass. If your son grows up to be a very handsome model and uses his looks to get a great job like those women and he ends up not working very hard but gettting paid very well modeling to sell on object of desire that his job is ass. Use what you have to get what you can!
Oh and damn those women are hot!
Kelli, I need to work on most of them...not the capper or the interrupting the reader ones, but the others, yes.
Amy, no worries on the book... I will be happy to get my treat though!
Duf, I like the "be small" recommendation. It's pretty new to me because my mom always told me to "be big, take up space and make noise." In the warmth of another's home, I think being small is appropriate and generous. I'm keeping that in mind when I visit my fam in Michigan next month (SO AWESOME!).
Mims, you're so sweet but wrong. Let me clarify the capper. The capper isn't only so that cappers can get into the stall, it's so that they can have access to a stall that they can get into when they need it. Many cappers, b/c of their cappedness, experience difficulties in relation to the bathroom (late notice of needing to go, long time logistically from when they get in the stall until they can get set up to actually go and the like. It is maddening, I suspect, to be a capper, see stalls open, need to go desperately and have to wait for an abled to get the hell out of the one freakin' stall that you can get into. -As much as I continue to adore you, yews wrong sweet petite.
sjdude, difference that makes a difference when it comes to objectifying women vs. objectifying men. Long story short, power distributed unequally = objectification of power(less) is imposed by the powerful...objectification of powerful is imposed by the self. Former = Ass. Latter = Choice
Try to see the world through eyes other than your own (and not just on vaca, okay?).
Understand that most people make the best choice for themselves based on their interpretation of what the options are. Read it again slowly. People don't make "bad" choices (put a less judgmental way, choices against their own best interest) because they are thrill-seekers. Or stupid. Or enjoy being in pain. They just don't see any other way. (Sorry if I sound strident. Well, kinda sorry. Maybe. No, not sorry at all.)
I am finally in the groove with the love yourself rule. It feels like I traded in my hairshirt for an angora sweater. Purr.
And, Lib, you are so right about the cappers needing the facilities RIGHT NOW. RIGHT NOW!
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